Not all of the “educational” phrases popular with parents are effective and useful for the child.
Some of these comments are harmful to children.
For a very simple reason: the child does not perceive words quite correctly.
The child begins to feel that mom and dad don’t love him very much.
In addition, the baby feels psychological pressure.
So, what are some “educational” phrases that all parents should avoid using?
"Boys are not allowed to cry" or "A girl must obey"
Imposing such gender stereotypes on a child will not lead to anything good.
Moreover, children perceive such remarks incorrectly.
Don't tell your son, "A boy shouldn't cry." Your child will probably think you're saying, "You don't have the right to show emotion."
And the phrase “A girl should always obey” can be perceived by your daughter as follows: “You must unquestioningly obey all adults, you cannot have your own opinion and your own aspirations, you are obliged to agree with the role of a victim.”
"Look how good your classmate is!"
The child will probably “decode” this parental remark as follows: “You are worse than your classmate, you are basically worse than the others, you can’t do anything and you are not capable of anything.”
Remember: you shouldn't compare your child with other children (especially not in your child's favor). Such an "educational technique" will negatively affect the child's self-esteem and make him or her feel insecure.
"Shut up right now!"
The child may come to the conclusion that he is not allowed to express his own opinion or talk about something.
Depending on the situation, choose any of the following alternative responses: “I can’t talk right now. Let’s talk later,” “This is not a place to talk loudly. Let’s postpone the conversation until later,” “There’s no need to interrupt or butt into the conversation. Raise your hand if you want to say something.”
Author: Kurchev Anton