You try to be the perfect partner: you don’t forget about flowers, you help around the house, you listen to stories about the work day.
But for some reason, instead of gratitude, you feel coldness, and in conversations you increasingly hear reproaches.
Sound familiar? You may be missing something that can't be bought or planned: sincerity.
Toxicity and codependency
Relationships are not a list of achievements. You can fulfill all the "responsibilities" but forget that behind them there is a living person with their own fears and desires.
Toxicity often hides behind the mask of correctness.
For example, you agree to everything to avoid conflict, but inside you accumulate resentment. Or you criticize your partner "with the best intentions", not noticing how this kills his confidence.
These patterns are like a slow poison: they destroy trust, even if everything appears to be going well.
One of the most dangerous scenarios is codependency.
When you sacrifice your interests for the sake of the relationship, your partner stops seeing you as an individual, and you lose yourself. As a result, both feel empty, but do not understand why.
How to fix this
Start with an honest conversation - not about who did what wrong, but about feelings. Say: "I feel like we've grown apart. Let's try to figure out why." It's important not to blame, but to look for reasons together.
Stop being afraid of conflicts: they show where the problems are. But learn to argue correctly: without insults, with a focus on the solution.
And most importantly, allow yourself and your partner to be imperfect. Love is not an exam for the highest score, but a path that you go through together, sometimes stumbling.
Author: Igor Zur