Imagine it's three o'clock in the morning and they're stomping around you like a herd of elephants.
The hand reaches for the phone to dial that short number... Stop! There is a better way.
Negotiators with criminals use the technique of “mirror empathy”: instead of confrontation, they join.
Knock on your neighbor's door and say, "I know you're having fun, but I have an important meeting in the morning. Let's agree: today you finish at 11:00 PM, and on Friday I won't mind some music." This turns you from an enemy to an ally.
Why does it work? The psychology of reciprocity: by offering a concession, you provoke a reciprocal one.
83% of people, according to research, agree to such conditions - simply because they were “heard”.
But what to do if the neighbor is aggressive? Use the "gray rock method": speak monotonously, avoid emotions, turn into a boring object that does not give a reason for conflict.
For example: "I heard you. I suggest we discuss this tomorrow."
Often, troublemakers are lost without “emotional nourishment.”
If the noise continues, involve other residents - a group request works 3 times more effectively.
Or try the "random gift": bring your neighbor homemade cookies and say, "I appreciate your willingness to talk."
This activates a sense of duty - now it is psychologically more difficult for him to ignore you.
Author: Elena Shimanovskaya