Why are some people rarely asked for help, while others are regularly burdened with other people's problems?
It's all about the non-verbal signals we send without even realizing it.
For example, frequent apologies without reason, the habit of smiling in tense situations, or the inability to say “no” are all markers that are read by others as an invitation to manipulation.
Try an experiment: for a week, record the moments when you agree to something against your will.
There will likely be common patterns in each case: fear of appearing rude, desire to maintain the relationship, or hope that they will help you next time.
But the paradox is that the more often you make concessions, the less you are valued.
To change this, start small. Replace the automatic "yes" with a pause and the phrase, "I need to think about it."
Not only will this relieve the pressure, but it will show that your time and opinion are important.
Another way is to practice a confident posture: straight back, eye contact, slow speech.
Even if you are nervous inside, your body is sending a signal: “It’s not that easy to negotiate with me.”
Over time, those around you will begin to feel this and will stop seeing you as a “convenient” person.
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Author: Igor Zur